Getting the words out

CBS woman says support group for stutterers making important strides

By Chris Lewis | Vol. 32 No. 31 (Oct. 16, 2019)

Allison O’Brien, who now lives in Conception Bay South, grew up stuttering.

It was something she was born with, and something she had to learn to deal with as a young child. As an adult and a mother, it’s something that she continues to deal with, but through her work with the Newfoundland and Labrador Stuttering Association, she hopes to help young people who also have the condition to learn better ways to cope.

O’Brien said in her case stuttering is hereditary. Her father, grandfather, and some of her uncles have a stutter.

She explained that while stuttering can be genetic, it is not always the source of the disorder.

O’Brien’s family noticed her stutter when she was two and learning to speak and string sentences together.

“It’s really hard for parents, when they realize that their child has a stutter,” she said. “There aren’t a lot of resources, or support, out there in our province.”

At the time, O’Brien and her family were living in Cape Broyle, on the Southern Shore. Several times a week, O’Brien’s mother would load her and her two brothers into the car for the hour-long drive to St. John’s so her daughter could get therapy.

The money for $100 per hour sessions came straight from her mother’s pocket. O’Brien continued with therapy right up to high school. But, she maintained, it never did help with her stutter.

Despite the stutter, O’Brien said, she was a very confident and outgoing child, even brazen at times.

“I would be like ‘Yeah, I have a stutter and who cares. You have to listen to me anyway.’ I was a part of every speech contest at school, and I definitely didn’t apologize for having a stutter. It was who I was, and I was okay with that,” she said. “I was lucky to have a family who was understanding and supportive.”

However, it was when she entered junior high that the challenges of having a stutter became more apparent.

O’Brien said she was teased, and noticed how differently her friends handled talking to boys on the phone or speaking up in class.

And while there were teachers who were understanding of her disorder, there were some who weren’t, she added, and that made her day-to-day school life more of a struggle.

“There were some teachers who would call on me repeatedly, on purpose, in order to increase my exposure,” said O’Brien. “They were trying to help, but that’s the complete opposite of what you want to do for a person who stutters.”

O’Brien said there are a number of things people can do when speaking with someone who stutters, but that it comes down to being respectful.

Maintaining eye contact, and simply listening are major points, while doing things like finishing a person’s sentence can make a person who stutters feel uncomfortable or frustrated.

O’Brien said she developed a lot of anxiety because of stuttering, and would try to avoid situations where she would be expected to speak.

“You can imagine being in class, waiting to be called on, and the anxiety that that would bring up in you,” she said. “Or, the idea of having to go to a job interview – all of that became a source of anxiety for me… I withdrew, and became what is called a covert stutterer.”

It was also during high school when O’Brien stopped attending speech therapy sessions.

“Therapists in Newfoundland and Labrador are generalists. They’re not adequately trained, nor do they have the time or resources, to actually delve into the anxiety that’s involved with stuttering,” O’Brien maintained.

“I would leave the appointment, and all of the realities of the outside world – the noise, the people, everything – it would all come into play again. That was never addressed in therapy. I gave up hope, gave up on the idea that I would ever be normal or ever have a job. I never thought I’d have a family, and I didn’t even know that that was even an option for me anymore. I withdrew, and everyone thought I was shy, but I wasn’t shy. I had a million things that I wanted to say, but I was afraid to say them.”

Still, O’Brien proved herself wrong, and went on to become a child and youth care counsellor, as well as a mother to her now 16-month-old son Levi. But she says the negative effects of having a stutter never left.

Even now, she said, she sometimes gets laughed at, hung up on, and even asked if she’s hungover or “slow.”

O’Brien said these things often do not come from a place of malice, but instead from ignorance and misunderstanding. And that is where the Newfoundland and Labrador Stuttering Association (NLSA) comes into play.

O’Brien sits as a board member with the group.

I looked at Levi. I really looked into his eyes that look just like mine.

Knowing that this is genetic, and that he may also have a stutter, I knew that I had to become a part of this, and try to make the NLSA a reality. Not only for Levi, but for all children who stutter, and who are different,” O’Brien said. “They all deserve to live in a better province than I did. One that is more understanding and more respectful, where they have better access to therapy if they choose to attend that. A province where they aren’t bullied or discriminated against, and are afforded the same opportunities as everyone else.”

The association is less than a year old, but O’Brien said it has made some significant moves toward achieving this goal. It is now a recognized not for profit, and provides support and information. The group hopes to provide support to speech-language pathologists and allied health professionals, and to lobby government for more resources to address stuttering.

The association offers a monthly stuttering support group, which takes place on the third Thursday of each month at the Reid Community Centre in Mount Pearl, and hopes to eventually host an annual conference for people who stutter, as well as their families.

Those looking for more information about the group can visit www.nlstuttering.ca.

O’Brien said. “They all deserve to live in a better province than I did. One that is more understanding and more respectful, where they have better access to therapy if they choose to attend that. A province where they aren’t bullied or discriminated against, and are afforded the same opportunities as everyone else.”

The association is less than a year old, but O’Brien said it has made some significant moves toward achieving this goal. It is now a recognized not for profit, and provides support and information. The group hopes to provide support to speech-language pathologists and allied health professionals, and to lobby government for more resources to address stuttering.

The association offers a monthly stuttering support group, which takes place on the third Thursday of each month at the Reid Community Centre in Mount Pearl, and hopes to eventually host an annual conference for people who stutter, as well as their families.

Those looking for more information about the group can visit www.nlstuttering.ca.